My cellar was a pig sty – needed total upheaval
Never in your life have you seen such a mess
Called up my friends but they all fessed
Some of this junk’s been sitting here since times primeval
Found a lawn mower that needs a lube
Found my old Zenith without a picture tube
And under my underwear I found ultimate evil
Common sense said”Get out!” but I didn’t heed it
Ominous canister, a menacing hum
Like a hell-spawned janitor in a drum
Couldn’t figure out how to care for it or feed it
Found out what I was looking for next
My Exorcism Calculus text
School requires math and this is why you need it
Incubus
Succubus
Differential calculus
L’Hopital
Decimal
Here comes Satan he’s your pal
Transform Fourier or Laplace
But you mess with Satan and he’ll kick your ass
Thought it was hell to be integrating
But you never had to deal with Satan
My parents, they reacted with overblown melodramatics
Worked all day, I worked all night
Computer blew the fuses and out went the lights
Transformed to the dark side of higher mathematics
Found the solution all hell broke loose
Trashed my cellar and cooked my goose
No more cellars for me
No more cellars for me
No more cellars for me
I’m sticking to attics
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